


I would reshape the universe for you (just say please and it’s yours):

by OktobersSon



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Abstract, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dreams vs. Reality, Dreamsharing, Endgame Will/George, Existentialism, George is a close approximation of God? Sort of?, M/M, Mention Will/Mia, References to Depression, oh man what do I tag this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 03:16:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28538700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OktobersSon/pseuds/OktobersSon
Summary: For as long as Will can remember he's been having strange dreams. Stranger than the normal kind of strange. In his dreams he sees an endless void and talks in circles with the being inhabiting it, a being who slowly comes to resemble a man.The man he names George follows Will throughout his life, as he desperately battles an addiction to sleep, falls in love, and tries to find his place in the waking world... Then upon Will's death, finally realising the breadth of his own emotions, George offers Will a new beginning.
Relationships: George Andrew & Will Lenney, George Andrew/Will Lenney
Comments: 6
Kudos: 12





	I would reshape the universe for you (just say please and it’s yours):

**Author's Note:**

> i should be writing Can you reach me through the static rn... im so sorry this just wouldn't leave me alone. it's just supposed to be kind of weird, kind of sappy, something to read over the morning coffee.

“How long?”

“I don't know,”

“I'll find you,”

“You always do,”

“Over and over again if I have to,”

“I know,”

“Don’t go,”

“I have no choice,”

“Please…” it's too late. He's already faded, the world goes black. Will wakes suddenly, falling lingers as a twitch in his limbs.

*******//**

The dreams don’t come every night. That frustrates him most. Will’s always had weird dreams, weirder than most. He learns early on his dreams aren’t normal, they’re otherworldly, strange... but not the same strange as everyone else’s. No raining meatballs, talking cats or robots with laser beam eyes for him. No, Will dreams of an almost God with glacial splintered eyes and the stretching eternity of the universe at his back. 

In his dreams he sees... George. Or the being he names George, given the age Will gifts him his moniker George could’ve done a lot worse. Even to a young Will, George seems to be so much more than human, simultaneously all knowing yet lost. During one of their earliest encounters - once Will finally gets over his fear and stops scaring himself awake, he asks where they are, only to receive ‘everywhere, nowhere, maybe somewhere in between’ by way of an answer. I his youth Will interprets that as George not wanting to admit he’s as lost as Will. Once he grows up Will knows better, the description of their crossroads comes to be strangely apt.

Every night Will falls into a void of sorts, it’s space, the universe, eternity paused. The ground is an expansive smooth surface, akin to a mirror stretching on forever in every direction, dizzying and confusing Will if he stares too long at the reflected foggy version of the space around him. Itself a stretch of darkness with no discernible horizon, only broken up by pin pricks of light - stars poking holes in the depthless void. But in front of him a watercolour sunset of yellows, oranges and pinks cascades and bleeds into the shadow, flaring out from an unknowable tear beyond. 

Over the years against the muted eternal sunset a silhouette begins to take form. First appearing as a cutout of solid void, a hole in the colourful mirage, but as Will racks up dream after dream, finding himself at their ‘crossroads’ more often than not as he grows older, George coalesces into a human shape. Eventually solidifying into a close approximation of a young man, compact and blue eyed with dirty blonde hair, he’s nondescript and wouldn’t stand out in a crowd. Will thinks his decision is purposeful yet no matter how many times he asks George can’t give him a reason for the understated form he settles on.

A key obstacle in their friendship, and big facet of Will’s initial fears, is his inability to look George in the eyes - once he has those. What starts out as two white pinpricks in the empty silhouette that makes up George eventually become two deep blue eyes as his form solidifies. They’re not plain, the more time Will gets to look at them the more he notices the crevasses and icey splinters webbing through a deep fathomless blue. Will isn't sure why he can’t look at them, they're just soft sad human looking eyes, but every time he lingers too long he wakes up. Each time it’s the same, awakening with a deep desolation crushing his chest, panicked and sweaty, he spends many nights holding his pillow close to dampen the sobs that wrack him for reasons he can’t understand. With a lot of time and many rough nights for Will they do eventually get to a point where Will can withstand eye contact, for which he is thankful because he really likes George's eyes, and staring into George's eyes and catching the moments when George looks a little less sad.

As Will ages, gets over his fear of George’s persistent otherness and comes to understand his unusual dreams are much more than they appear the pair begin to talk. Talking with George initially feels like a long and winding journey without a goal or end in sight, much like the void in which their conversations take place. His responses are rarely straight forward, his knowledge of who, how and why in relation to his odd existence leaves many of his answers vague or hinging on speculation. Although Will comes to enjoy this aspect of their exchanges, George frustrates and excites him in equal measure, finding the abstract of George’s existence a puzzle not to be solved but to be explored, and Will greatly enjoys asking new questions only to find more vexation with each cryptic answer.

Throughout his childhood and into his adolescence, no matter how bad his waking hours are, Will takes comfort in the knowledge he can visit George, sooner or later. From the age of 12 his dreaming world cements itself as the inky void he nicknames the ‘crossroads’, every time he falls asleep he soon finds himself in the vastness of space with George awaiting him - always there first, Will isn’t sure George actually leaves despite his claims to the contrary. As with every teenager becoming a young adult Will faces plenty of ups and downs, from exams and acne to worrying about which uni to attend and finding his place in the world, throughout it all George watches, learns and even frets in his own quiet way when Will is unhappy or anxious or stressed. He doesn’t quite understand why Will’s discomfort causes him pain in return, however a rising instinct to make Will happy follows along with it - he doesn’t fight the new impulse. George just really wants Will to stay happy, healthy and alive, whatever the cost, and that cost makes itself known soon enough.

The older Will get the more he wants to reject the waking world. The more time he spends with George the more Will's sure George definitely isn't something he dreamed up as a child with an overactive imagination. George is simply too other to be the creation of his childhood imagination, and fuck knows how he would of unconsciously sustained the same dreaming landscape into his adult life. The most Will concludes is George is what happens when someone tries cramming sentient shadow and light into a human shape but never explains to it how to 'be' human, so it just emulates human expression and movement and hopes for the best. And fuck his traitorous heart but Will is wholly enamoured with George, his otherworldly nature, even his roundabout way of making a point. 

It starts with a ‘healthier’ nighttime routine, he stops staying up to ungodly o’clock in the morning, refusing to stay up any later than 12. However his self-imposed curfew quickly stretches to the weekend, cutting caffeine and going out less with his friends quickly follows. From there Will’s desperation to sleep spirals into something much more extreme, initially it’s just herbal remedies, when those stop working he opts for over the counter pills. Before long they’re not good enough so Will begins lying to his doctor to get stronger and stronger sleep medication - he's a busy uni student so his doctor gives in surprisingly easy. In the end he spends more of his life asleep than awake, his waking commitments and relationships suffering for the more for it, all culminating in an inability to fall asleep without medication. He knows he’s damaging himself, potentially ruining his life before it has a chance to begin, and he knows George can see it too but he continues finding ways to justify it to himself and George has yet to challenge him about it. In the end he gives up justifying anything - Will just wants to be with George, that’s reason enough.

On the eve of his 21st birthday Will tells George he loves him.

'I love you, I'm in love with you I guess is what I mean,'

'I know.'

'Of course you do. You probably worked it out before I did,'

George does something that could be approximated as a giggle. The sound is pretty mischievous coming from George, Will considers it could be one of his new favourite George sounds, his annoyed sigh comes in close second. He’s not sure George actually knows how to be annoyed, but when he’s pretending he gives a heavy, if unnecessary breath, and shakes his head, without fail the display cracks Will up.

'Yeah, maybe I did,' Will isn't surprised, he knows George well enough by now to have expected such an answer. Understands when George says ‘maybe’ he isn’t being facetious, he genuinely isn’t sure what does and doesn’t know most of the time. He’s not all knowing, yet in the same breath he is. Given glimpses of the past and present without knowing which he’s seeing, leading to a quasi-omniscience that leaves George in a permanent state of mild confusion.

'I don't expect you to say it back or anything, I just wanted you to know'

'I don't think I can love you back, I don’t know how. I'm glad you told me anyway,'

Will continues ruining his life, and his body, in an effort to stay asleep, his family notice, his university notices, he even loses his job. It’s George who finally calls time, his personal form of intervention coming not long after a failed family intervention - incorrectly fearing Will is suffering some form of mental crisis at the prospect of uni and standing on his two feet, Will in turn cuts them off thus isolating himself even further. Hearing what Will’s done George hits his limit, he’s already worried but at this point he feels true fear for the first time in his very long existence. Gently explaining he may be gone for awhile George tries to encourage Will to focus on his studies as well as reconnect with his family. He then disappears for a year. Will, at first distraught, eventually begins putting his life back together, with the help of his doctor and the support of his family he slowly spends more time exploring the waking world, finally excited at the prospect of being awake for the first time since childhood. 

After a year of quietly watching Will from the darkness George returns. Will hides his relief well, getting straight to the point when he finally speaks,

'I told you I loved you and you vanished,'

'I forget how long a year can be for you. I am sorry, Will. But you were hurting yourself for me, it hurt me in return, it was very distressing,' His face twists into a rather cold approximation of a solemn frown. Time has eroded Will's soft spot for George’s weird mannerisms, he finds them a little disconcerting once again, he's frustrated to find himself back at the start but still very much affectionate for his strange friend.

'I loved you. What did you think was going to happen? Of course I wanted to spend more time with you, there was nothing good for me up there,'

'Past tense? Have you found some good? Something worth living for?' George gives a weary smile, looking barely 22 and yet somehow far far older than all of time with one facial expression. Will's heart stutters in his chest, it's the realest rawest emotions he's ever seen George display, however he won't lie to him.

'I... Yeah. Yeah I think so,'

'There's a little good everywhere if you're willing to try searching for it, what did you find Will?'

'Her. I found her, she's called Mia, I think I'm in love with her,' The ‘too’ goes unsaid, and Will’s heart throbs painfully when he sees a little but genuine quirk to George’s mouth - he truly is happy for Will. Although, George himself is baffled to find the information saddens him as much as it makes his year of absence worth it. Will, however, isn’t done.

'But you didn't have to leave George! Didn't have to just vanish, I thought I'd never see you again. I grieved you! And I did it alone because there was no one I could talk to about us,'

'You wouldn't search while I was still here Will, I was hindering more than helping you, that's why I had to go, I did it as a kindness,'

'But you didn't have too. I feel the same as when you left!'

'Do you? Do you really? The man I left refused to live, he was only looking for new ways to achieve a waking death. Are you sure you're still that man?'

'I... No,’

Will wakes with a start, heart pounding a rabbit's rhythm. He feels alive, he feels complete, he feels at peace. The closure he needed to move on, to thrive in waking life, finally settling like a long missing puzzle piece in his chest. Rolling onto his side he slides an arm around Mia’s waist before slipping into his now usual dreamless sleep.

And so George watches, cherishing their time together during Will's nightly dreaming, but equally enraptured with his day time happenings. Over the years, as time begins creasing laughter into the edges of Will’s eyes and presses his smile permanently into the lines on his face, George continues to watch and watch and watch. Eternity is merely a blink to him and he would watch Will for as many eternity's as he had to give. Unfortunately humans are frail, soft creatures and Will didn’t have even one of his own eternities to offer, his short life only a handful of sand grains in the grand scheme of the universe. But still George watches Will, is taught to laugh by him, guides him when he asks, and thinks he learns a little what it means to love from him. 

It was the strangest of realisations, that maybe his willingness to see Will happy and healthy; to wish to see Will at his brightest and best; to desire achingly to pick him up when he’s down, and to crave to be the one who got to hold him when the darkness tangles a little too tightly around his heart - finding himself barely able to suppress the need to rent and reshape the universe when things don’t go Will’s way, maybe all these needs, these wants, these desires, maybe they were love. George couldn’t be sure but he thinks after all the years, decades, almost a century of watching Will, he is slowly beginning to comprehend the strangest of all the emotions.

Only he’s left it too late because he knows as surely as he knows Wednesday smells like gummy worms, that today is Will’s last. His hourglass run dry. Not that Will minds, he theorised the night prior he had, maybe, until the end of year, but it's been a long three years without Mia. Plus knowing he can’t wait around for George to go before he does Will has had enough, made his peace and is ready for whenever the ‘reaper’ comes, more than happy to face death head on with a smile on his face. George like his humour and strength of spirit, everlasting even in his final moments. Although he's has bad news about the reaper. He couldn’t make it, so Will will have to make do with George instead.

George has been simultaneously selfish and not at all selfish his entire existence. There’s no one to be selfish too when it’s just you and the universe, no one to steal from or covet against. But for the first time, possibly in the history of all space and time, he finds himself interjecting ‘selfishly’ against the will of nature. He can’t part with Will, selfishly refuses to even consider it - doesn't matter how many eternity's he can live, or how many he’ll need to get over Will, he doesn’t want to. There will be no getting over Will, not until he’s at least told Will he loves him too. Then Will can have the final decision on passing over, or, hopefully for George, not.

“Hey George,” He doesn’t look a day over 32, once he works out he doesn’t have to at the ‘crossroads’ he never does. However, the rasp in his voice belies his age, not that George cares. He’s always perfect to George, the universe's greatest creation, yet and ever in his humble opinion.

“Hello Will,” He’s worried his excitement is seeping into his tone. To Will he sounds as plainly amicable as ever, George knows this without even reading him, yet still he finds himself feeling more, just more, more intensely than he ever has.

“It’s always a fine night's sleep when you visit,” Will’s smile is gentle, always as genuinely pleased to see George as George is him.

“I’m afraid not Will. This is it. This is your end Will.” Will blinks up at him in surprise, trying to comprehend he's being informed of his own death, by his best friend no less.

“Oh,” Is all he manages at first, then his knees buckle and he sinks to the floor, drawing his legs up to his chest he squeezes his eyes shut and takes several deep breaths, choking on empty air. George quietly waits, giving Will the time he needs to process. They have nothing but time now and he’s never had any problem sharing his with Will. 

Eventually he looks up at George, confusion is not a surprising emotion to find written across his face but Will’s following question isn’t what George expects the first to be following the revelation of his demise,

“So, if I’ve died... Fuck, that’s weird to say. Why are you here George?”

This is a bit soon for George who hadn’t wanted to tell Will of his feelings until after they’d got all the questions surrounding his death, as well as the after life that awaits Will out of the way, but he isn’t about to deny Will the truthful answer, 

“Because I love you Will. I’m interrupting the flow of the universe to share my eternities with you, if that’s what you want of course, I won’t stop you moving on if you don’t want to stay,” His honesty is weighted, heavy, it’s a lot all at once but George has never been one for holding back. Whether discussing the complexity of the universe or forming an opinion he gives his all. If George thought Will looked overwhelmed at the knowledge of his death he isn’t prepared for the multitude of emotions and expressions flitting over Will’s face in the wake of George’s admission, still George waits with endless patience, letting Will work through his feelings. 

Eventually Will rises unsteadily to his feet, George ensures his face has settled into something impassive over the inquisitive stare that previously occupied it, he knows Will can feel the weight of his gaze anyway - still it feels like the polite thing to do. Will opens his mouth intending to finally reply before giving up, closing it again and pressing his palms into his temples while scrunching his fingers through his hair. George believes he may have been witnessing what Will referred to as ‘blue screening’ so he continues to wait quietly.

“You. What? How? I’m sorry but, ‘interrupting the flow of the universe’?! Is that safe? Are you allowed to do that?” They’re good questions, George knows Will is a dogged combination of smart and curious so it’s no surprise he’s asks the tough stuff first. Unfortunately George doesn’t have much in the way of satisfactory answers for him, as he himself doesn’t actually know, such are the mysteries that make up the universe and all that flows through it, much like George himself.

“The universe Herself is a creation of few words so being allowed to, or not as the case maybe, I have no good answer. As for if it’s safe, I don’t know, I guess we’ll find out together. If that’s what you want of course,”

“I guess I’d never really thought about if you had like, I don’t know, a boss or something,” Will lets out a small laugh, barely a huff of air, but it’s his first since George told him he’d died, and so soon after, George decides to take it as small victory, but a victory nonetheless.

“But what do you mean you’ve never done it before? I get that causally tearing the universe to shreds isn’t something you do every day, but aren’t you like endlessly old, or just ya no’ permanent or whatever,” He waves a hand, vis-à-vis, signalling he’s not worrying about the technical terminology right now, so George doesn’t interject to re-explain his inexplicable nature, “haven’t you had other friends you’ve talked to like this? Who wanted to stay with you after they passed?” Vulnerability and the need for honest communication is a need George understands, and one he’s always encouraged in Will, but even so, this is rending George a little too open for what he’s comfortable admitting, needless to say he still answers honestly because he can’t refuse Will a damn thing,

“No Will, there have been no others, only you,”

“Impossible” it’s whispered, more to himself than George, but of course George hears it anyway as clear as if he’d shouted it,

“Why is that impossible?”

“Why the heck did you hang around friendless for all your existence, well up until you started talking to me? Why would you do that? Why pick me? There’s been so many more interesting, smarter, just better humans, like… I don't know, the Egyptians, Louis Prince, or… that guy who drew the golden ratio fella ” 

“The Egyptians were more than capable of building their pyramids without my help, and both Michelangelo and Louis Le Prince were definitely smart but they weren’t you,”

“So, why me? Was it even anything to do with me, or was it just a random accident? If you can even have random or accidents?”

“I know lots of things Will, but not always what they are or why I know them. I did nothing until I did,”

“Like you waited for me, without knowing you were waiting for me?”

“Maybe, I knew I was waiting for something, that’s all that mattered,” 

“Fuck this is complicated,”

“Is it?”

“Doesn't this feel complicated to you?”

“No. Now it makes more sense than ever,”

“No way, get explaining then?” Will sits cross-legged on the floor, like a student in class, the way he always does when he’s asking George questions with big answers. George does something uncharacteristic, something new, he comes to sit in front of Will, bringing his knees up to his chest in the same fashion he’s seen Will do a hundred times before. The position is comfier than he expected. He swiftly understands why such a simple posture makes Will feel safe. Surprised, Will uncrosses his legs only to recross them with George’s feet in the middle, hooking his legs around the backs of George’s ankles. George enjoys the gesture but says nothing in favour of answering Will’s initial question.

“I waited, for what I didn't know and it didn’t matter but I waited and then there you were, and now here we are. and I feel like me, I know who I am, and what I like and I know you, and who you are, and what you like, and what you don’t like. how Sunday nights sometimes make you cry, and how you looked at Mia on your wedding day like she created the universe and everything in it, how in your youth you loved to bury your face in Darcy’s fur when the world felt too big and too bright, how you think PG Tips is overrated but you still drink enough of it that, in my opinion because I have those now, they should have given you shares in the company, and all the other big and little things that make you, you. I wouldn’t have any of those things without you,”

“But you could have had any of those things without me, you could of had them with billions of others,”

“I could have, but I didn’t, you’re my friend, _you_ , Will. I’m the best version of me when I’m with you, I think that’s enough. I think that should be celebrated. it doesn’t matter what I could have had with anyone else. This is about me and about you, and about what we share, together,”

“I guess it really doesn’t have to be that complicated, doesn’t matter who I could’ve been, just matters who I am. Now. With you. That’s really fucking beautiful George, getting a little emotional to be honest,” Will finally concludes around a weak smile, trying his hardest to stop the tears threatening the corners of his eyes, “although probably wouldn’t be a proper death day without a few tears,”

At that Will stands, pulling George up with him because he can do that now, touch George casually and not worry about being vaporized by whatever matter George is actually comprised of. Threading their fingers together the pair wander toward the cascading sunset, 

“I’m sorry it took me so long to workout what I was feeling, what I wanted, I’m so sorry Will,”

“I spent my life with Mia, and I loved her, and still do, but I think I’d like to share at least a little of my afterlife breaking the fabric of the universe with you,”

“I would never stop you if you ever did change your mind and want to move on,”

“I know, but let's not talk about breaking up before we’ve tried, okay?”

“I can agree to that,”

“Are you going to stop me from putting Jesus in someone’s soup or burning him onto their toast? Or like giving some kid really cool prophetic rockstar dreams?

“Are you trying to start a cult Will? Because that’s how you start a cult.”

“I mean I wasn’t until you suggested it,”

“Oh no. I’m not going to have a moment to relax for the rest of our eternity's, am I?”

“George you had plenty of time to get your relaxing in, if you were too busy reading too much into your abject loneliness that’s not my fault. I already have so many ideas! You’re kind of weird and out there, I’m sure if you let yourself get into this a bit you could come up with all kinds of spacey ideas, dreams and cults and deep meaning in the meaningless. Perfectly George levels of weird,”

“And you’re already pulling me into this…”

“What are best friends for? Just mull it over, it could be fun I promise,”

“I’ll think about it. But that’s all, just think, not promising anything,”

“You could probably think a whole second universe into existence if you wanted it badly enough, you saying you’ll think about it is enough for me,”

“I feel this universe just got plenty more exciting without the need for more of them,” 

Will takes a deep albeit unnecessary breath as they pass through to the limitless beyond **,** more than a little excited at the prospect of seeing what’s on the other side of the tear in the universe hidden amongst the bleeding colours. To see where his very strange life, now unlife, is going to take him next.

**\\\\*******

“I love you George,”

“I love you too Will,”

“Here's to the rest of eternity,”

“And then a few more after,”

  
  


**FIN.**

**Author's Note:**

> if you read to the end thank you so much, this was an odd one, let me know your thoughts below. remember every comment, kudos, bookmark and subscription fuels my caffeine induced writing haze! Novi, @novioktober on tumblr


End file.
